At least that’s what Nude Magazine thought, who printed this brief version of my ‘I Was a Swivel Chair’ story:

Name: Swivel Chair. Town: Edinburgh, Scotland. Years: 1999-2004

Influences: KLF, Pet Shop Boys, Joy Division. Career Highlight: Our third triumphantly drunken gig.. Lowpoint: Our fourth disastrously drunken gig. Line Up: Craig Low (bass, samples) Milo McLaughlin (vocals, guitar) David Robertson (99-2002): madness, Dave Burnett (2002-2004)- lead guitar, production

I met Craig working in a miserable till-monkey job at HMV on Edinburgh’s Princes St.  He had already started recording Swivel Chair as a joke, using the recording software Acid, and he handed me a CD on which he had used a recording of the store manager giving him a bollocksing over a Led Zeppelin sample.

I was impressed and when he suggested I come up with some lyrics/ideas for a Swivel Chair track, I jumped at the chance and our first collaboration, The Man Who Listened to Planes was recorded, wholly based on the A-Team theme.

A few more sample based comedy recordings (with original vocals) and a friend agreed to sell our CD in Fopp Records- to our surprise we sold quite a few. We were even more surprised when our second EP got us some brief record company interest. However we were stumped when they asked when we were playing live as neither of us could play an instrument.

Our egos inflated, we decided to stop using samples and learn instruments. Third member David Robertson, who lived in Dundee, was also cruelly ejected from the band as egos ran riot, and a new member, Burnett was reluctantly recruited. The only one who could play his instrument, there was a lot of pressure on Burnett as we started rehearsals.

Finally we played our first gig using a computer to provide backing tracks. It was an entertaining spectacle and a few drunken girls danced, but we were barely competent and doubt set in for Craig and Burnett. There was a significant break in which they both refused to play live and we half-heartedly agreed to split up before we were approached by a band called Quantum Ho Ho. Unbeknownst to us they had bought our CDs and it had inspired them to start their own band.

We reluctantly reformed and played three more gigs in support of them. One was mediocre, the second was a triumph, despite full drunken arrogance and a stand in guitarist who we’d only had one rehearsal with; the night before. We were high as kites as XFM Scotland (then Beat 106) DJ Jim Gellatly proclaimed our set “Fuckin’ Mental”. Unfortunately underlying tensions and alcohol led to a bust up after the gig in which punches were thrown but no-one except pride was hurt.

A week later and the final gig was an utter disaster due to lack of a soundcheck and this time being the wrong side of wasted. I threw a tantrum at the soundman. The others laughed at me. Our bonds were broken. Craig and I are still in contact now and again and have joked that we would reform if 1000 people demanded it. So far 8 people have expressed a vague interest.

Read the first 4 parts of the full tale below (originally published on the first Gaseous Brain blog in 2005 but extra video and mp3s have now been added)

• I Was a Swivel Chair – Part 1
• I Was a Swivel Chair (Part Two)
• I Was a Swivel Chair (Part 3)- Witness No.1
• I Was A Swivel Chair (part 4)

As my Twitter and Facebook friends will already know, a couple of weeks back I did a guest video post about Oink! Comic, one of my favourites when I was a kid, for the excellent Fred Egg Comics blog.

The blog, which is proving to be a great re-introduction to the world of comics for me, is run by my old Swivel Chair bandmate David Robertson, who is an excellent comic artist in his own right. In fact those of you with the fanzine will have already read my below review of his latest creation, Dump, which you can find more info on here.

(ps: see A Brief History of My Creative Efforts Part 1 for more evidence of my love for Uncle Pigg!)

David Robertson’s Dump: Comic Review

Dump is a small press comic by David Robertson which brings together a number of short pieces most of which were originally produced by the author for other outlets.

The title may lead one to think that the comic contains some scatological humour, and ‘Contemplating Suicide While Someone Else Craps’ is indeed a one page piece with some very black toilet humour.

However, “It’s Delhi Belly”, a piece drawn for an anthology unsubtly called “Crap Your Pants”, is actually a sober tale about someone who finds out they’ve contracted Crohn’s Disease. It’s a factual piece which made me think it was autobiographical, but according to the notes at the back of the comic it was thoroughly researched and written with the truth in mind.

It also contains a story which is itself called ‘Dump’ which is not in fact a bathroom related tale, but about the protagonist of Robertson’s former comic Berserkotron starting a new job at a scrap metal yard / council dump. I sense that this is a story that could follow through to further issues rather than being standalone.

Other tales in the comic include one which considers how positive discrimination would affect humans in a Star Wars style universe where we have a relatively short lifespan, and an undisguised autobiographical account of a single day for the Hourly Comics Day project. Robertson’s unique way of thinking makes each story interesting, and is also evident in the section where he imagines the thoughts of the models from his life drawing class.

There’s something of Harvey Pekar in the straightforward and commonplace nature of many of the events, and the art is simple yet effective which perfectly matches the tone. If Robertson were to weave some more emotional aspects into his stories he could develop to be a storyteller to watch.

You might also be interested to read Dave’s interview with the awesome artist Peter Bagge, written for Nude Magazine. Strangely, the very same issue featured a picture of Swivel Chair, as I had previously written a piece for their ‘beautiful losers’ section about the band. Spooky..

My girlfriend is into her craft stuff and found these cool Star Wars mini amigurumi created by Lucy Ravenscar who can be found at: http://lucyravenscar.blogspot.com/ Excellent work Lucy!